Angel: Not Fade Away

Angel: "This may come out a little pretentious, but one of you will betray me."
Spike: "Can I deny you three times?"

I know Joss Whedon loves to break our hearts, but this is ridiculous.

The title refers to the old quotation, "Old soldiers never die; they just fade away." This should have been my first clue that Everybody Was Going to Freaking Die. I expected death; last week's preview said someone would die, and I even suspected that it would be tormented, exhausted Wesley. But come on! Joss has reason to hate The WB; does he hate the fans, too?

Don't get me wrong. Most of the episode was absolutely terrific. The "what would you do if it were your last day" thing was poignant and beautifully in character: Angel spending time with Connor; Lorne singing on stage; Lindsey making love with Eve; Spike getting drunk in a bar and performing his poetry; and Gunn going back to see his old friends in the neighborhood. Wesley made the most touching choice, spending his last day mending Fred's soulless ghost of flesh.

But I hated all of the deaths. I saw Lindsey's assassination coming, and it really pissed me off -- especially because (1) he could have been on the path to redemption, and (2) he was killed in cold blood by our own sweet green Lorne, who didn't need that death on his conscience. I adored Lindsey, dammit. The only thing that upset me more was Wesley's death in "Fred's" arms. Five years ago, when he debuted as Buffy's new, prissy Watcher, I couldn't stand Wesley; but for the past two years, he's been my favorite character. Too much, dammit. Too much.

Illyria grew as a character; i.e., her willingness to join the battle, her concern for Gunn, her tenderness and grief for Wesley ("Would you like me to lie to you now?") But I'm still sad that there was no resurrection for Fred. Illyria told Wesley that he was going to be with Fred; I would like to believe that Illyria knew something we didn't, that something of Fred's soul survived after all. I would like to believe that Fred went to the same heavenly dimension Buffy once occupied, and that Wesley joined her there.

The fight with Hamilton was too long and crashy, although I loved Connor saving the day, and Angel drinking Hamilton's power. I'm glad there was such terrific closure with Connor. I found the following exchange particularly touching: Connor: "They'll destroy you." Angel: "As long as you're okay, they can't." I'm a mom, I can relate. I'm also pleased that Lorne lived, because he's a big favorite of mine as well.

But I hated the end. Hated it, hated it, hated it. We've been hearing about the Shanshu prophecy since the end of season one, and Angel just signed it away. Yes, technically Spike could still fulfill the Shanshu prophecy, and Angel and Spike (as well as Gunn and Illyria) could have survived the onslaught somehow, but clearly, we're not meant to believe that they did. We were left thinking that they're all going to die, fighting the good fight. And yes, in a karmic sense, that may be just what should happen.

But we may never have another series set in the Buffyverse. Many have guessed that The WB lied about possible TV movies to placate the angry fans. As much as I wish it weren't so, this is most likely The End. We'll never know what happened to these characters we've loved for so many years. Angel did not fulfill the Shanshu prophecy, the five-year promise made to his character, and now he never will. I feel cheated, angry, and hurt.

Would it have been so hard for them to leave our heroes alive and fighting evil, to have one of our ensouled vampires receive the big Reward, and to leave Lindsey in charge of Wolfram & Hart?

Tying up the loose strings, bits and pieces:

-- There was one final appearance of Anne, a.k.a. Lily, a.k.a. Chanterelle, our lady of the homeless shelter, still using Buffy's middle name. We never did find out what her real name was.

-- Angel did kill Drogyn, after all.

-- Harmony's last good scene was reminiscing about high school and her death on graduation night, which was appropriate for the character. I wasn't surprised that she betrayed Angel.

-- Spike's poem for Cecily first appeared in "Fool for Love," my favorite Buffy episode.

-- Gunn got to slay vamps with the double stakes in the alley, just like Angel in the pilot. And the place where they made their last stand was north of the Hyperion, the same alley where the show began. Full circle.

-- Lindsey's last word was "Angel." I find that touching. I think Lindsey really did love Angel, in his own twisted way.

-- We got one last tune from Lorne, "If I Ruled the World." I wish we'd gotten one from Lindsey. A duet would have been fun.

-- "Your friends at the WB," my ass. Their little goodbye tribute actually gave Angel's age as 277, which shows how little they know or care about their own shows. They obviously have contempt for the "intelligent people who like depth in their shows" demographic, so I'm sure they won't miss me.

Quotes:

-- Spike: "Yeah, we're all one big happy Manson family."

-- Archduke: "The Circle does not abide secrets." Angel: "Which is interesting for a secret society."

-- Lindsey: "Everybody goes on about your soul. A vampire with a soul. Nobody ever mentions the fact that you're a vampire with really big, brass testes."

-- Angel: "I want you, Lindsey." (pause) "I'm thinking about rephrasing that."

-- Spike: "First off, I'm not wearing any amulets, no bracelets, broaches, beads, pendants, pins, or rings."

-- Connor: "Come on. You drop by for a cup of coffee, and the world's not ending? Please."

-- Gunn: "You take the thirty thousand on the left."

-- Angel: "Well, personally, I kind of want to slay the dragon."

Let me close with Spike's poem, since he has improved so much over the past one hundred and twenty years. Too bad we didn't get to hear "The Wanton Folly of Me Mum."

My soul is wrapped in harsh repose
Midnight descends in raven-colored clothes
But soft, behold -- a sunlight beam
Cutting a swath of glimmering gleam
My heart expands. It's grown a bulge 'n it
Inspired by your beauty effulgent.

The writing, the emotion, the fidelity to the characters -- all four stakes out of four. But the rushed, painful, black ending broke my heart. It didn't have to end this way.

Over and out,

Billie