Buffy: Teacher's Pet

Xander: "It's funny how the earth never opens up and swallows you when you want it to."

This is a silly episode without much of note, except that it is firmly established that Xander is a virgin and that Sex is Bad, a recurring theme in the series.

One of Buffy's teachers is kind enough and perceptive enough to tell Buffy that she has "a first rate mind" and can think on her feet. And what happens to him? He ends up decapitated by a praying mantis, and stuck in a cafeteria fridge. Life is not fair, especially in Sunnydale.

Angel is back, and Willow and Xander finally meet him. Xander is immediately jealous, no surprise there, even though Angel doesn't do much in this episode but show up and look mysterious and handsome. David Boreanaz has started working on his patented Angel scowl and is now dressed more in character in a sleeveless tee shirt and leather jacket, which he quite romantically gives to Buffy. (The jacket, not the tee shirt.)

The scene where a flustered Mr. Flutie dithers and yells at Buffy that she must heal is wonderfully in character. I also really enjoyed Cordelia's speech to the counselor about it not being necessary for a teacher to die just so she could lose weight, and Xander's daydream where he's in cool clothes, doing a guitar solo, and rescuing a frilly and adoring Buffy from vamps.

Bits and pieces:

-- How did they cast Miss French? "A pretty teacher type that will be morphing into a six-foot praying mantis, big teeth a must?"

-- Why Dr. Gregory? Was he a virgin? And how did the eggs appear in the end shot if Miss French didn't mate with him first?

-- Giles translated "entymology and mythology" into "bugs and fairy tales."

-- There is a musical line about playing with your food. Apt.

-- No vamp villain again, although we do get one scary Freddie Kruger fork-for-a-hand vampire. But he just has a supporting role intended to point out how much scarier Miss French is than a vampire.

-- Xander's middle name is Lavelle.

-- Obligatory dog reference: Giles on the phone to his insane friend Carlyle: "You were right all along about everything. Well, no. You weren't right about your mother coming back as a Pekingese..."

Quotable quotes:

Miss French: "The praying mantis is a fascinating creature. Forced to live alone. Who can tell me why? Buffy?"
Buffy: Well, the words 'bug-ugly' kinda spring to mind.

Mr. Flutie: "Don't say dead! Or decapitated, or decomposing. I'd stay away from D-words altogether."

Mr. Flutie: "We all need help with our feelings. Otherwise we bottle them up, and before you know it, powerful laxatives are involved."

Cordelia: "I'm not saying that we should kill a teacher every day just so I can lose weight, I'm just saying when tragedy strikes, we have to look on the bright side. You know?"

Buffy: "Okay. Factoid 1: Only the praying mantis can rotate its head like that. Factoid 2: A pretty whacked-out vampire is scared to death of her. Factoid 3: Her fashion sense screams predator."
Willow: "It's the shoulder pads."
Buffy: "Exactly."

Giles: "This computer invasion that Willow's performing on the coroner's office, one assumes it is entirely legal?"
Willow: "Entirely."
Buffy: "Of course."
Giles: "Right. Wasn't here, didn't see it, couldn't have stopped you."

Miss French: "Have you ever been with a woman before?"
Xander: "You mean, like, in the same room?"

Willow: "What do we do now?"
Giles: "Abject prayer and supplication spring to mind."

One out of four stakes,

Billie